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A Ranma ½ / Oh! My Goddess crossover story
by Trella

Disclaimer: Ranma ½ and its characters and settings belong to Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Kitty, and Viz Video. Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon belongs to Takeuchi Naoko, Koudansha, TV Asahi, and Toei Douga, and DIC. Oh, My Goddess belongs to Fujishima Kousuke, Kodansha, TBS and KSS films; AnimEigo, Studio Proteus, and Dark Horse Comics. I write this with the utmost respect, etc, and I bow low before the Genius of Rumiko Takahashi. I'm not worthy, I'm not worthy, I'm not worthy! Now… on with the story…

Chapter 2: The Interrupted Date, or Happosai's Gold

Since the arrival of the Goddess Freya in Nerima, and into Shampoo's life, there had been a change in the relationship dynamics of the town's resident martial artists. The Official Fiancée Brigade (as Ukyo started calling it) was getting along well — very well indeed. This was due to the fulfillment of a wish Shampoo had made, that Ranma would declare his love for her, and that everyone would be happy. And in fact, Ranma had indeed become a lot closer to the purple-haired Amazon, and somewhat more affectionate… there were times when Shampoo's enthusiasm tended to embarrass and overwhelm him, especially in public, but he no longer pulled away quite so much from her fond embraces. Nor did Akane or Ukyo pounce on the boy for daring to even look at Shampoo. The reason for this is that they all — Ukyo, Akane, and Ranma — had entered into a pact uniting themselves with Shampoo. All this was, unknown to them, courtesy of Freya, the Nordic Goddess of Love, Lust, and Battle.

Said goddess was currently in the Tendo Dojo, along with the rest of the gang, working out under their observation. She'd been at it for a while now, and was covered with a fine sheen of sweat (Goddesses don't normally sweat, but since Ranma and the Fiancée Brigade didn't know she was a goddess, she thought it would lend a sense of verisimilitude to the illusion of her being simply a member of an obscure Nordic Amazon tribe). Cologne had taken it upon herself to educate the divinity in Joketsuzoku martial arts, and to the surprise of Ranma, Akane, and Ukyo, she proved a quick study. For Ranma, it was amazing to see someone else pick up a style, no matter how complex or involved, as quickly as he did. Even Ryoga, the only person he considered a serious rival in the arts, took a little time at it. Not much, true, but a little. Of course, he didn't know Freya was a Goddess. No one did, apart from Cologne and Shampoo.

The fire-haired Goddess paused in her exertions, gulping from a bottle of water. These Chinese martial skills were a bit more… involved than she was used to, back in the days when she stirred up trouble in the frigid North, but it was an enjoyable challenge. Turning from the waist, arms and legs moving just so and in perfect coordination, the importance of timing… she was beginning to see why it was called martial arts.

"Say, Freya… Want to try a real opponent?" Ukyo had been watching Freya go through her forms rather intensely. The chef still didn't entirely trust the Nordic visitor, and even if she hadn't put any moves on Ranma yet, that didn't mean she wouldn't. After all, her friend, and now love, had this unfortunate habit of inadvertently attracting the affections of just about any woman he met. Ukyo sometimes wondered if it were possible to have that capacity surgically removed. And she knew that she wasn't alone in her fears and suspicions regarding Freya. Akane shared them, too. The two of them had talked about the northern Amazon during a little two-girl sleepover at Ucchan’s, in between… Well, let’s just say that Ukyo and Akane were getting along very well, and leave the details for later. This was her chance to see just how good this interloper really was. And if she managed to "accidentally" land a few hard blows… Well, that sometimes happens in sparring, and no one would be able to blame the chef, would they?

So it was that Ukyo readied her large baker's peel, and Freya pulled out of seemingly nowhere a short sword, about a yard in length, of a style and make none of the assembled martial artists had ever seen before. They assembled around the goddess in curiosity to examine the blade.

Ranma hefted the sword as he looked it over. "Man, it sure is heavy. Is it a traditional weapon of your tribe?" he commented.

Freya nodded. "It's a sharpened crowbar, basically. Keep in mind, though, this was designed to chop through chainmail armor. Even if it can't slice through, it would still smash up any bones it came in contact with."

"Is very different from Chinese jian. Not so flexible," Shampoo critiqued.

"That's true, but I'm still getting used to those whippy things you call swords. I like this type. Got a lot of body to it."

"Yeah, but… Well… Wouldn't a sword like that be, well, kinda brittle?" Akane asked.

"Some of them, sure… but this blade… This one is different. You could hit a tank with it and it wouldn't break. In fact, there's not much on earth that could break this sword. It’s very special," Freya explained. She left out the fact that what made this particular sword so special was the fact it was forged by dwarves. Not that she much cared for dwarves.

Ever practical Nabiki had to comment. "Yeah, but if you're facing a tank with just a sword, fat lot of good any weapon like that would do you. You'd be dead."

"Nabiki!" Kasumi chided.

Freya smirked. "With an ordinary sword, sure. Even with this one, maybe. but with Runding…"

Kasumi wasn't a martial artist by any means, but she did have a deep interest in other cultures and peoples, and always eager to learn something new. And there was something about this Freya that fascinated her. "Who's Runding?"

"Runding? That's a sword… a very special sword, possessed of the power of the Giants."

Nabiki scoffed. "Yeah, right, a sword that can beat a tank. This I gotta see."

"Hey! We gonna talk or fight?" Ukyo protested impatiently.

"Oh, yes… Sorry." Freya smiled in apology. The two combatants took position at opposite ends of the dojo and took up their stances. Freya's was quite relaxed, sword held loosely down along her side. Ukyo assumed an on-guard posture, with her spatula poised to receive and repel any attacks her opponent might make. But said opponent showed no inclination to charge, evidently being quite happy to remain where she was.

Ukyo struck, slashing with her spatula. Anyone not familiar with the arts would think that Freya was in mortal danger of being bisected across her middle, but Ukyo had no intention of inflicting permanent damage. Roughing up her opponent a little, or at least putting a good scare in her, however…

But Freya didn't scare. Instead, her sword went into action, intercepting the cut and stopping it cold. A twist of the goddess's arm and the spatula was directed downward as the sword slid in past its shaft pointed directly for Ukyo's sternum. Only a deft turn and block with the spatula's shaft prevented contact. Ukyo countered with a short, sharp jab to the goddess's jaw with the butt end of her spatula, which Freya dodged; but the kick the chef also delivered connected, slipping in under Freya's guard and taking her by surprise, spilling her to the ground. Ukyo reversed her weapon and stabbed downward, but Freya rolled out the way.

A deft backflip brought the goddess to her feet again. It was her turn to attack, launching a series of cuts and thrusts that Ukyo barely managed to block, sometimes resorting to using the flat of her spatula as a shield. She wasn't expecting her opponent to slam herself bodily against the spatula, forcing Ukyo to take a few steps back to preserve her balance. The two combatants took advantage of the space between themselves to catch a few much needed breaths.

"You're a lot better than I expected," Ukyo pantingly conceded. She had expected Freya to be rather a pushover, but instead found her to be a skilled opponent. Freya nodded in affirmation. "You too, darlin'. You want to continue, or call it a draw? ‘Cuz I got a date to get ready for."

Surprise was general. "A date? You move fast, don't you? You've only been here for a couple of weeks. Who's it with?" Nabiki asked. She didn't know if this Freya could bring in a bit of extra yen, especially since she was too old to be seen around Furinkan High School, but perhaps she could create a market for Freya photos and rumors. After all, the woman was quite stunning. There was something a bit… odd about Nerima's newest guest, but Nabiki couldn't put her finger on it.

"Yeah, who's the lucky guy?" Ranma wasn't out to exploit the financial potential Freya presented, nor did he entertain any naughty thoughts about her. After all, he already had three girls. He was just curious. So was everyone else.

"Well, sure ‘nuff I move fast, darlin'. No sense in waiting, is there?" Freya explained. "As for the lucky guy — and he doesn't know just how lucky he is — let’s see… his name is… er… Takkee… Tookie… Tootie… Well, something like that, anyway," she stumbled over the name.

Surprise at the news of Freya's date turned to astonishment as everyone realized what name the goddess was trying to say. "Kuno?!" voiced six people simultaneously as they all spontaneously facefaulted. Kasumi, of course, was much too calm to ever facefault, but even she stumbled a little.

"A date with Kuno! The Blithering Idiot of Furinkan High?" voiced a shocked Nabiki.

"Stupid stick boy?" expressed Shampoo.

"I don't know what all the fuss is about. I encountered him a couple days ago, and he seemed a very perceptive young man. He even called me a fire-haired goddess, and his way with words reminds me of the guys back home in Valhalla," Freya explained.

"Kuno calls everyone who wears a skirt his goddess. He'd likely even call a Scotsman on a horse his goddess! He's even called me his ‘pig-tailed goddess’!" Ranma protested.

Freya was shocked. "He called a guy a goddess?"

Ranma groaned, remembering a certain nasty dream he had just after he met Kuno. "No, he calls me that when I'm a girl!" he exclaimed. "When I'm a guy, he just calls me the 'foul sorcerer Saotome', and that's about the nicest thing he says."

"And I have to beat up or punt him into the upper stratosphere just about every school day. I swear the baka's obsessed! 'Akane Tendo, I shall date with thee' this, 'Akane Tendo, be my love' that…" Akane complained.

"Good source of money, though," Nabiki amended

"I don't know, Freya. You might want to reconsider…" Ukyo suggested.

"Is true. There maybe not woman brave enough to date that one," agreed Shampoo.

"Hey, I'm a big girl. I can handle myself. If Kuno's truly as bad as you say, I can just fetch him a good solid bop on the head if he gets any ideas," Freya reassured her friends. "But then, look at me. How can he not get ideas…? Heh. Just so long as he doesn't act on them." And the Nordic Goddess of Love and Lust struck up a suggestive pose and winked at Shampoo, who blushed, then smiled seductively at Ukyo, who gulped nervously.

Unknown to them all, the proceedings were being observed by a hidden pair of nasty, evil, reptilian eyes, gazing on the assembled martial artists and one goddess with deep malice. Well, maybe it wasn't quite that bad, but since those eyes belonged to one Happosai, you can judge for yourself.

"Hmm… the boy seems to be getting along better with his fiancées. Wonder how that happened?" the old man puzzled from his place of concealment. "And that tall babe… Shampoo said her name was Freya; living with her and the old bat at the Cat Cafe? Bet she's got some worthwhile frilly pretties. Better hurry, though. She said she's got a date with that Kuno brat. Hah, that should be some match! If I leave now, I should be able to have just enough time to snatch the goodies!" Cackling to himself, he managed to slip out of the dojo without being noticed. He was, after all, a master of his art.

The wizened — but not at all wise — pervert reached the Nekohanten rapidly, and made straight for Shampoo's room. He knew where it was, of course, since he often "visited" for choice panties. The purple-haired Amazon had quite a collection of silky undergarments, with garter belts and a few very clingy teddies. No bras, though. None at all. Happosai could attest to the fact that Shampoo never wore the things from the times he managed to grope her. Made getting bashed up so worthwhile. But there was some new garments added since his last visit, on another side of the room. Some slinky clothing was laid out, including (Oh joy!) a bra that was barely there! This must be that babe Freya's goodies, the old man thought to himself as he went through her collection of panties and bras. This snow bunny must be in a competition with the Amazon cutie, Happosai thought to himself, in the downright scandalous quality of underclothes. The things women wear these days… Shameful, he cackled silently. And quicker than thought, Freya was suddenly missing a few items of clothing, and the collection of the master pervert had grown by that exact same amount.

He was just set to leave — wouldn't do to be discovered, after all — anyone that can hold their own against Ukyo just might be able to land a punch on him ("Hah, like that'll be the day…"), when he saw a glint of gold on the dresser. "Ooooo, pretty," he thought. "I'll take that. After all, if Freya left it just lying around, it can't be too valuable or important." Besides, Happosai was seemingly part jackdaw; see something shiny, pick up same.

Upon closer examination, it proved to be a necklace, but it was no mere chain to grace milady's slender throat. The first thing he noticed, as the old pervert picked the necklace up, was its weight. It was much heavier than any other article of jewelry he had ever come across. It was also of a far more ornate design than he had ever seen, being constructed of thick gold braids that twisted and intertwined so much that the eye couldn't follow each individual braid, becoming lost in the overall design.

The weight of the thing suggested that it was made of solid gold. That alone was enough to leave him panting. But what really made his jaw drop were all the gemstones that encrusted the necklace. There was practically no place on it that was not covered by blood red rubies, sky blue sapphires, bright diamonds, or emeralds so green that they were like a the essence of a living plant, captured and crystallized.

This was much better than magic mirrors or Love Pills, he gleefully thought to himself. If Happosai was a true criminal, he could sell the necklace to one of the less reputable museums and have made his fortune. But financial gain wasn't why he took things like frilly undies or jewelry. After all, who would buy used panties? No, it was the essence of the wearer that remained on the garments — and there seemed to be a lot of essence in this Freya's goodies — and especially the necklace.

The evil old pervert gathered up the panties and bras he had selected and stuffed them, along with the necklace, into his bag and slunk his furtive way out of the Cat Cafe. And just in time, too, for Freya had arrived to get ready for her date.

It had been quite a while since the goddess was on anything resembling a date (several centuries, in fact, but who was counting?), so she was rather excited. But not so excited that she missed the mess in the room (Happosai never cleaned up after his raids; not only was he a colossal pervert, he was also inconsiderate). Freya didn't remember leaving her half of the room in such a state, but since she was in a hurry, she simply shrugged, gathered a few things, and headed off for a quick shower.

She returned to the room she shared with Shampoo, only partially dressed in a rather lacy bra, matching panties, and half-slip to look for her most treasured item of jewelry. Odd… she could have sworn she left her necklace right there. Well, maybe she placed it… No, not there, either. Where could it be? And the mess left by Happosai soon was as nothing as the increasingly desperate goddess rifled through the entire room in search of her necklace. How could she possibly go on her date without it? And just where was it? Maybe Shampoo had seen it. Freya cast forth with her mind, and sensed the Amazon was still at the Tendo dojo. Not bothering with any covering other than what she had on, Freya teleported to the dojo, heedless of the chance of discovery (after all, if someone were to see her oozing out of a telephone, she might have a bit of awkward explaining to do.)

Unfortunately the patriarch of the Tendo clan was passing by the phone just after it rang once and deposited an upset and very worried goddess into the Tendo residence. He had seen Freya before, but she never looked so tall and majestic as she did now, or so scantily clad. She waved briefly at Soun as she passed, and the honorable and most worthy Mr. Tendo slumped onto the floor, with a glazed look in his eyes and a slight trickle of blood issuing from his nose.

Freya quickly made her way to the dojo. Everyone was quite surprised to see her back so soon, and to see so much of her, dressed as she was only in her undies. Before anyone could comment on her state of comparative undress, the desperate goddess grabbed Shampoo by the shoulders and pleaded, "Shampoo! Please tell me you've seen my necklace! Has anyone seen it?!"

Dramatic irony required that, just as Freya received negative responses from Shampoo and friends, the thief responsible for the goddess's desperate search should enter, and this is just what he did, with his customary gleefully triumphant cackle of "What a haul, what a haul!" Then he stopped, boing, as he got an eyeful of a tall and divine form in a state of partial undress. He acted as his nature demanded; he dropped his sack of goodies and sprang up with a cry of "Yowza! Sweeto!" and latched himself onto the surprised goddess, burying his face in between her breasts and giving her a most unwelcome nuzzle. Her surprise and dismay at having the nasty little leech attach itself to her frontage was understandable, and she reacted in the way most of the female martial artists in Nerima react whenever Happosai came face-to-breast with them. She smashed her elbow down on his head, panting in her anger and feminine outrage. The most evil master in Japan slumped down at the goddess's bare feet, but recovered quickly and sprang back up, ready for another joyful grapple.

Unfortunately for the ancient pervert, Freya did a quick psychic scan of the old freak — know your enemy, after all, and surely a friend wouldn't plant his face in between her generous assets without permission. What she found instead was the emanations of her precious and treasured necklace, calling out to her from inside the old freak's garments.

Her eyes blazed in righteous anger. "You… You have it… Give it back to me!" Freya growled.

Happosai was puzzled. "Give what back?" he asked, all innocent-eyed. After all, in his profession, a variety of items and objects came into his possession, and the babe from the frozen north could be referring to just about anything.

"My necklace, you foul gnome!" she clarified. "I know you have it, now give it back to me!"

"Necklace? What… Oh! You mean this necklace!" The old pervert pulled out the item in question and spun it around on his finger. "Hey, don't sweat it. Let's do a trade. I'll give you this sparkly if you do something for me, babe!" Happosai leered.

Freya didn't much care for his suggestion. "Do you… have any idea… what I had to do to get that thing? And you're trying to steal it from me… and you want me to… to… You hateful, nasty little dwarf!" (The reader might want to consult the notes at the bottom to learn just what Freya had to do to earn her necklace in the first place. As for what our goddess thinks Happosai wants her to do to get her most prized jewelry back… Well, she's wrong. All the old freak wants is a quite innocent strip show.) As the most evil martial artist in Japan gloated and teased her with the necklace, dancing in merriment around her, with Freya futilely trying to grab her prized possession, the goddess moved her hands slowly in an arc from her sides to over her head. To the assembled young martial artists in the dojo, it looked as if lines of force and energy were being drawn into the tall woman, and a nimbus of power surrounded her. Her hands were glowing fiercely as she brought them down from above her head to chest level, her palms spread outward, and with a shout in a tongue that no one understood, a bolt of sheer power lanced out, sizzling and crackling in the air, and impacted the completely surprised Happosai (who had seriously underestimated his opponent) square in the chest.

The old man was propelled across the dojo, flying through a wall and smashing against a tree outside. Happosai would have complained of this unwarranted (in his opinion, anyway) rough treatment, but the only thing he could manage to say at that very moment was, "Oog…" Short, concise, and very much to the point.

Ranma boggled. He, who had mastered several chi attacks, had never seen or even heard of one like Freya just demonstrated. Man, he just had to learn it, he thought to himself. Shampoo's reaction was somewhat different. She knew what the Cat Cafe's resident goddess just did was no chi attack, but a manifestation of divine power. And quite frankly, it frightened her. She had seen some of what Freya could do, but until that moment, she regarded the goddess as a delightful companion (especially at night), but basically harmless. Now that she had seen Freya angry, she had to revise that opinion.

Ukyo was impressed, too. "Jeez, Freya, I don't know what you did or how you did it, but way to go! Half the population of Nerima's been wanting to do something like that to the little freak!"

Nabiki concurred. "Too bad I didn't have my camera. I could have made a fortune selling the photos, even at half price!"

Freya smiled and waved her appreciation. "Y'all excuse me for a moment? I've got a necklace to reclaim, after all." She stepped delicately through the hole the pervert left in the wall. The rest of the gang went out through more normal apertures and caught up with the goddess, only to hear her complaining wail, "He ain't human!"

They found her gazing at a tree that had suffered impact and scorch damage, and there was a patch of ground at the base of the tree that bore signs of a body having fallen heavily there. Of that body, however, there was no sign.

"Man, the old freak's got more lives than a cockroach, and just as annoying!" Ranma observed.

Akane conferred with Ukyo and Shampoo for a minute, then turned to Freya. "Look… Freya… Ukyo and I still don't really trust you, especially around Ranma. Shampoo does, but that's her business, I suppose. But you put a good whammy on grandfather Happosai, and he's still got your necklace. If you want, we'll help you track him down, okay?"

Ukyo nodded. "Call it a… Necklace Reclamation League. Besides, helping you pound some more on the geezer's its own reward."

"Hey, you can count me in. I owe that freak a good pounding or three," Ranma added.

"Where Ranma go, Shampoo go. I help, too." Shampoo still wasn't used to the notion of a multiple relationship between herself, Ranma, and Ukyo and Akane, or she'd have added their names. But it was the thought that counted.

Ranma, Akane, Ukyo, Shampoo and Freya, still only in bra, panties, and half-slip, intertwined their arms and intoned, "Necklace Reclamation and Revenge League! United to bring the evil Happosai to justice!" And the five of them went off in search of the said evil pervert, leaving Nabiki and Kasumi behind. They both knew they'd only be in the way — and possibly even a liability — in a battle with the old man.

Kasumi gazed unhappily at the Happosai-sized hole in the wall. It looked very untidy. She'd have to call that nice repairman again. But there was something else troubling her; something she thought she saw when Freya was glowing. But that was silly, of course it couldn't have been…

There was something on Nabiki's mind, too. "Say… uh… Sis… You're going to think I lost it, but when just before Freya did that chi thing to the old freak… Well, did you just happen to notice anything that looked like… Well… Wings?" Nabiki almost whispered that last word.

"Oh yes, I was just thinking about how odd that seemed," Kasumi affirmed. "But of course it couldn't have been wings, now could it? It must have been just a trick of the light." Kasumi almost believed her own statement.

Nabiki didn't quite. "A trick of the light that we both saw? Sure, Sis. If you say so. But there's something not quite right here. I mean, this thing between Ranma, Akane, Ukyo and Shampoo. Isn’t there something about it that bothers you?"

Kasumi blushed deeply. "You… you don't think that they… I mean… four people? Is it actually possible? And they're still too young for that sort of thing."

Nabiki rolled her eyes. "No, Kasumi, that’s not what I meant. I just mean… Well… there's something about this whole crazy set-up that strikes me the wrong way. I just wish I could figure out what it is."

As the two Tendo sisters continued to discuss what they thought they saw, the Necklace Reclamation League (self-proclaimed) pursued their quest for Happosai. They searched for him here, they searched for him there, they searched for him everywhere. To coin a phrase.

More precisely, the gang looked for the old freak in all his usual haunts. They scoped out the local cheap restaurants. They checked out the women's public baths (Ranma would have gone in, but Akane and Ukyo and Shampoo weren't about to allow that.). They staked out various laundromats where women were washing their undies. They checked out the local jogging tracks and exercise facilities, where women would be working out in t-shirts and snug shorts, or extra-tight Lycra. In short, they looked into any place where young women might be doing anything at all. They even looked for an indicative trail of aforementioned undies that might lead the gang to their quarry. They gazed off in the distance, hoping to see dust clouds that would indicate a certain quite dirty old man was getting pummeled by a horde of outraged young women. But search as they might, they found no trace of Happosai.

"Well, I'm beat. there's no telling where the little spud's hiding himself," Ukyo said, mopping her brow.

"Yeah. Why can't he ever make it easy, even just once?" Akane agreed.

"Sorry 'bout this, Freya, but we need a break. There's a playground over there. got one kid on the swings, but—" Ranma took a closer look at the kid as he spoke. something was a little bit funny about the… Wait a minute, that's no boy, that's…

The rest of the gang followed Ranma's finger as he pointed, and chorused as one, "Happosai!"

The old man in question looked up in surprise as he suddenly found himself surrounded by a pack of irate martial artists. "What? I thought I gave you the slip! Figured you'd never look for me in such an innocent place like this."

"Never mind that. You have something of mine and I want it back. Now!" insisted Freya.

The old geezer sighed wearily. "All right. You got me. I know when I'm licked. So you might as well have… this!" And while it was normally against his principles (he has principles?) to rough up women (groping them is another thing entirely), in Freya's case Happosai decided to make an exception. After all, what she did to him back at the dojo, he owed her a few good lumps! He pulled out a large ball with a fuse lit and hurled it at the goddess, shouting, "Happo Fire-burst!"

The gang scattered, shouting warnings to Freya, who simply stood her ground as the ball detonated, engulfing her in fire. To the astonishment of everyone, Freya walked through the flame and smoke, quite unharmed, and, more incredibly, quite untouched by the explosion, which left a small crater in the ground. It was also quite evident the Nordic goddess was very, very angry.

"My necklace," she demanded in a voice as cold as her northern homeland. Happosai would have continued his resistance, but… Well, that sword tip he found suddenly pressing rather hard against his throat was awfully persuasive. He never even saw Freya's hands move. Who the hell does she think she is, Toshiro Mifune? he thought to himself. But he saw no further point to continuing his little game; not for now, anyway. Especially since that determined look in the Nordic Amazon’s eyes suggested she wouldn't have any hesitation about thrusting her blade deep into his throat. So, defeated, he took the necklace from within his robes and dangled it on the sword-tip.

Freya upraised the blade and allowed the necklace to slide down its length and into her waiting hand. "Thank you!" she beamed happily. She skipped joyously to her friends and, starting with Shampoo, caught each of them up in her arms for an impromptu victory dance. "I got it back! I got my necklace back!" Freya sang.

"Whoa, Freya! You northern Amazons got some serious moves!" admired Ranma

"Didn't you feel the explosion?"

"What explosion?" asked a genuinely puzzled Freya.

The gang all pointed to the crater left by Happosai's fireburst.

"Oh. When did that happen?" Freya wondered. And she wondered some more when the others fell flat on their faces once again. Must be a Japanese thing, she thought to herself. "Oh no, look at the time! Curse it, I'll have to put off that date for another day. Oh well, Kuno'll live. Shampoo, remind me to give him a call when we get home, okay?"

The Necklace Reclamation League withdrew in victory, leaving a brooding Happosai behind, alone with his thoughts, which were filled with the desire for vengeance. "I don't know where this Freya gets off, but she can't treat me like this and get away with it! I'll have my revenge yet, and that goes for her little dog, too!" And Happosai wandered off to plot and plan… and also to buy some bactine. Those bruises and scrapes of his were really beginning to hurt.


To be continued.

Author's notes: There may be those among you who are somewhat confused about Freya's attachment to her necklace. Okay, you might be able to buy a sizable amount of the gold in the Fort Knox Depository with the thing, but and just what was it that Freya did to earn it in the first place? Well, according to Nordic mythology, Freya was slumming one day, visiting the dwarves in their caverns, and she found a certain necklace that she absolutely, positively had to have. She offered the dwarves gold, but they had that already. She offered them gems of price and value; ditto on the sparkly stones. In fact, just about anything of worth or value Freya could offer them, the dwarves already had. After all, if they didn't have that sort of stuff, they wouldn't have been able to make that necklace. So, negotiate and bargain as she might, there was nothing Freya had the dwarves wanted. Well, almost.

Freya did have something the dwarves wanted, after all. They wanted her! The necklace could be hers, they informed her, only if she would spend a night with each of them. And I mean, intimately. Freya really wanted that necklace, so she did it… and did all four of the dwarves, too (although, one assumes from reading the story, not all at once. And shame on you for thinking that!) Now Freya doesn't like dwarves much. Guess who reminds her of a dwarf?

Next time: Freya and Kuno go on a date, and a certain friend of the goddess pops in to visit. Will Nabiki and Kasumi open up an investigation to find out just who and what Freya is? Find out in the third chapter of "Aiyah! My Goddess?"

Yes, this chapter is rather silly. I was still getting used to writing at the time this was written. Happosai will be making another appearance in a later chapter, being the dedicated little troublemaker that he is. In fact, I have an idea…

This fanfic brought to you by Obelix and Dogmatix Menhirs… Menhirs while you wait!

Chapter 3
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