Ranma ½ - Sailor Moon crossover story
Disclaimer: Ranma ½ and its characters and settings belong to Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Kitty, and Viz Video. Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon belongs to Takeuchi Naoko, Koudansha, TV Asahi, and Toei Douga, and DIC.
"Ranma, hurry," Makoto called to me. Telerin and I were discussing some of the eccentricities of the strange religion that had sprung up around the spell constructs and how the citizens of Chicago lived. Thousands upon thousands of years must have passed since the Chicago I knew existed. The culture here had absolutely no memory of its origin.
There was a knot of girls gathered around a south facing window. Telerin and I walked over, still talking. "Chicago is constantly on the move," the Caretaker explained. "When resources begin to grow scarce, teams of men are gathered to make excursions to the surface."
I had figured something like that. "What about food? There must be a lot of people to feed in a city this size." There were small gardens behind most houses, but they couldn't possibly support the multitudes.
"Perhaps I should rephrase my last response. The teams of men are trained foragers that work in groups of several thousand, at the very least. Littered across the world are tracts of land completely barren of life, despite our passage having been centuries ago." Okay, that was a pretty good answer.
"And what happens when the city is over open water?" That comment about the land being barren after Chicago's passing was unusual, but I decided to drop it for now.
Telerin shrugged. "Chicago is adequately supplied with fishing vessels. Fish, and especially whales, have many useful bodily components." I hadn't seen any harbors, and boats didn't just park themselves in a garage somewhere. That was another unimportant issue.
We were right behind the girls now. They made a path for me, either unconsciously or intentionally blocking Telerin's further approach. "Wow, nice mob." Mob didn't really describe the mass of screaming maniacs that was slowly crawling towards this building. I squinted and sharpened my vision as best I could with chi. "It's Stinky!" Sure enough, the first Caretaker we had met was leading the ravening army of idiots towards us, waving his unbroken arm wildly above his head.
"He works fast," commented Telerin, finally managing to squeeze his way through the girls' defense. "What did you do to the Tyrant?"
Tyrant didn't sound much like an insult when Telerin said it. It sounded like a title. "I broke his arm in seven different places." Telerin looked at me in horror. "What?
"He-he's t-the Tyrant. The Tyrant is the spiritual leader of the entire city of Chicago!"
I don't think Telerin was too happy to be my associate anymore. In fact, I think Telerin was seriously thinking about jumping out of the unglazed window and ending what he felt would be a significant amount of future pain.
I laughed at the distraught man. I couldn't help it. "What kind of idiots are you people, to let a monster like that come to power?" The sneer on my face was a nice addition to the derisive tone I took. The odor alone should have kept the pervert out of office.
Telerin seemed unfazed by my attitude. He looked mournfully down at the approaching horde. "My life hasn't really been very enjoyable, anyway. Maybe I'll be reincarnated as a bird or something."
Ah jeez, he was about to start crying. "Cheer up," I said. "Stinky and his crowd aren't going to bother us, I assure you." This is where having legions of pokémon comes in handy. The deeply ingrained fear of all non-human (with the exception of horses and a few chickens I saw earlier) life the people of Chicago seem to have, doesn't hurt one bit.
So much for cooperation from the population. "Time to turn loose the pokémon," I informed the Senshi. They were each carrying their six strongest, most fearsome beasts, with the exception of Rei, whose super rat was the only occupant on her ball-belt. Usagi had thrown a bitch fit about leaving all her others behind, but we'd convinced her to leave them under guard with a couple of Dragonites.
Chances were that no one would bother our pets; then again, those tapestries had depicted men doing battle with demons. That must have been a long time ago.
"I don't understand what—" That was as far as Telerin got, seeing as how twenty-eight pokémon were materializing a few hundred feet in front of the mob. He screamed, like I'd expected, and tried to bolt for the stairs. I reached out and grabbed him by the hood of his robe, jerking him back to the window. He screamed again when I made him look at the pokémon who were doing their best to look mean.
"Calm down, man, calm down!" I shouted in his ear. "They're not demons!" He probably thought I sounded like a lunatic, trying to convince him that Demon and the other pokémon weren't actually demons.
Telerin screamed. I slapped him. He didn't stop screaming. I finally just gave up and decked the wuss. "I guess we should try out the cute, cuddly ones next, eh?" I asked as we watched the mob come to a screeching halt. It didn't really slow down all that fast— mobs don't do that— but they took a lot less time than I had imagined. Demon threw his head back and cut loose with an absolutely huge column of flame. I was really proud of him. The other pokémon followed his lead, and within seconds there were all kinds of deadly energy attacks blazing through the sky.
Poor mob, I almost felt sorry for it. All those people that got trampled as it turned around and ran for its collective life probably weren't feeling too well either.
"Setsuna, how could you trust someone who so blatantly associated with demons?" Haruka shouted, shocked at Sailor Pluto's (the single person whom was never ever supposed to be wrong) blunder and the toll it had taken on the ranks of the Senshi.
"Don't question me, girl," commanded Setsuna rigidly. She couldn't blame Haruka for being mad about being taken out of her car in the middle of a race, it had then hit the wall and exploded, but she wouldn't allow the lesser being to question her. "I am not totally infallible. Whoever manipulated me into contacting Ranma must be unimaginably powerful. I fear that even if the Inner Senshi were here, this new threat could simply ignore us."
"What about Crystal Tokyo? Can't we get some help from the future Senshi? The way I understand it, the Inners bailed them out of a pretty bad situation before Haruka and I awakened." Michiru reached out to stroke Hotaru's hair. The little girl had taken a turn for the better after the phenomenal growth spurt last year that had returned her to preadolescence, but now her health was worsening almost by the day. Setsuna believed Ranma or his master to be the blame for this, too.
Setsuna shook her head in frustration. "As of right now, the Inner Senshi have no future. Therefore, there is no Crystal Tokyo."
"Is there anything we can do?" Haruka asked, her hands gripping the arms of her chair tightly enough to make the wood creak.
"We have one chance and one chance only," Setsuna answered. The Outers leaned forward in anticipation of the solution. "I can send you two back in time, without your powers, and hope that you'll be able to manipulate other magical warriors into destroying Ranma before his powers are fully realized."
"Why wouldn't we have our powers?" Haruka asked, sounding angry, but inwardly frightened. She'd been an absolute bitch to almost everyone, and relied heavily on the security of being able to transform into Sailor Uranus. After all, who in their right mind messes with someone capable of calling up an earthquake with a snap of her wrist?
Setsuna sighed. "Since you already exist in the past you will be traveling to, the link between your planets belong to your past selves. Unlike the Inner Senshi, who are true sorceresses, you three get your power from a direct mana-bind with your respective planet."
Michiru asked, "Won't this course of action violate the blood pact between you and Ranma, Setsuna?"
"No; as long as I don't directly participate in harming or killing Ranma, the pact remains intact." Setsuna had made the mistake of underestimating Ranma and the amount of spite he carried within his heart. He would pay; oh, he would definitely pay. With his miserable life.
"Hotaru can't come with us, then," Haruka said firmly. They all knew that the little girl's power as Sailor Saturn was the only factor keeping her alive.
"Of course not," confirmed Setsuna.
"Oh, Ryoga, ohhhh!!!" Kasumi moaned into her pillow as Ryoga thrust into her for the last time, spilling his seed deep into her womb. Still trembling as tiny orgasms rocked through her, Kasumi drew Ryoga into a passionate kiss.
The eldest Tendo was just drawing back for a breathe of air when her door banged open. Ryoga squeaked in fright and attempted to hide under the covers.
"There you are," Nabiki snapped. She was dressed in a leather negligee and had a coiled bull whip hanging at her hip. "It's my night with him, Kasumi."
Kasumi looked down at Ryoga, his cock still held tightly within her. "But, Nabiki," Kasumi whined, "I thought you had a date tonight. Can't we make work something out?"
Nabiki shook her head. "I'm horny." She walked over to the bed and grabbed Ryoga by the ear. "Come on, lover boy."
Ryoga finally spoke. "Um, can-can I have a break, please?" His face was flushed and his left eye kept twitching. Between them, the Tendo sisters hadn't let him get a night of sleep in almost a week.
Nabiki shook her head. She reached down and caressed Ryoga's dick, still hard and ready to please. "No, I'm afraid not. Akane's waiting for you in my room, and she's a little desperate for relief. You should do just the trick. Then it'll be my turn for a few hours." Ryoga looked like he would cry. "Don't worry, Kasumi, I'll bring him back in the morning," she assured her older sister.
Downstairs, Soun Tendo cowered in his closet, weeping uncontrollably. He clutched his head in a desperate attempt to keep out the horrible sounds coming from upstairs. It did him no good.
Telerin came awake with a start and hurriedly surveyed the room. When he found no demons— or pokémon, he calmed dramatically. I couldn't spoil the moment, so I said, "No, it wasn't a dream."
The man didn't even scream. "What are they? The old tales claim that demons have no masters, yet you and your women clearly control those creatures."
I ignored the growls of promised pain to come from the girls. Telerin was just not at his best today. "Demons do, in fact, have masters. But that's beside the point. Those creatures you saw are called pokémon. They're animals on the last world we visited. Most of them are too cute to believe, but we picked our meaner looking ones for today, just in case crowd control became a problem."
"So they're not going to eat my soul and wear my skin as a trophy?" ha asked hopefully. Where had he been getting his information? Sure, demons ate souls, well most of them did, but none of them wore human skin. From a demon's point of view, wearing a human's skin would be about as bad as draping themselves in used tampons.
"No, Telerin, none of that. The big one with the wings that started out blowing fire into the air, he eats other pokémon sometimes, but that's nothing for you to worry about."
"That pokémon is a menace," Rei snapped. She had her super rat in her lap and was scratching it affectionately behind the ears. It had burn salve spread across its right side, and most of its fur had been singed off, making it even uglier.
"Demon isn't the only fire pokémon, you know?" I think Rei was just jealous that her only pokémon was so small that it could fit between the teeth of Demon. Telerin started to look panicky again. "Don't worry, Telerin, Demon is just the name of one of my pokémon. He's not really a demon." I wonder if Ami could whip up some homemade Prozac, or maybe some Perkeset (not sure on spelling), because we needed this guy sane, and if he started freaking out every time we mentioned pokémon, we might as well toss him out the window and find another Caretaker.
"Well, if that monstrosity hadn't decided to show off, Ratty wouldn't be burned, now would he?" I'll be glad when some of the girls' pokémon mate and start laying eggs. Rei really needs something to focus on besides that beaver-toothed rodent.
I waved the matter aside with a dismissive gesture I just knew would piss her off. "Give it a potion and a few hours sleep and it'll be fine." Back to scaredy-pants. "How about we head on down to those archives you mentioned earlier? I need to look through them and see if there is anything I'm forgetting to ask you."
"Anything to get out of this place before another mob shows up." Telerin stood, then his eyes got that nervous quality to them again. "It doesn't really bother me, since I'm of the much smaller order of Caretakers that remain celibate, but your women aren't properly dressed to move through Chicago. We would be able to pass with much less attention being drawn if they were better concealed." He didn't even know how close he was coming to getting mauled by a pack of angry Senshi.
"We'd better clear something up real quick. These girls aren't my 'women'. They're my friends and students for the most part, and royalty of a sort on our home world. Actually, if those Wings of God things weren't annulling their powers, each of them would most likely be able to destroy this city by themselves, so treat them with some respect." There was just enough implied threat in my voice to get the message through.
Telerin coughed, then looked at the group of Senshi who stood glaring at him. "I'm terribly sorry for my earlier behavior, ladies, and your clothing is nice, I assure you; but no woman in Chicago is allowed out in her undergarments. Unfortunately, what you are now wearing is quite a bit more revealing than the standard undergarment would be."
The Senshi were nodding reluctantly. I thought they all looked pretty good, myself. They wore colors that matched their elemental affinities, an unconscious action, I think. The shirts and tank tops were pretty tight and the shorts and skirts could have been longer, but back in Japan and PokéWorld, those clothes hadn't been anywhere near daring. "What would you suggest they wear?" I asked.
Telerin looked around the room. There were lots of cloaks and robes laying around, some left behind in the evacuation and others hung on racks. "If you ladies kept the hoods drawn and altered your stride adequately, we could all pass for men. That would save us a lot of hassle when we get to the Archives."
I nodded and began collecting armloads of the garments. I wasn't the only one to do this and we soon had four giant piles of black, green and purple robes and cloaks. The Senshi took way longer than I thought necessary to find stuff that fit them. When they finally did, though, we headed down the stairs with Telerin in the lead.
"Your mirror should allow you to find Ranma, Michiru," Setsuna told them. "Its power is directly related to your soul, so it will still work, as will your sword, Haruka. Once you find the boy, do not harm him," the temporal mage stressed. "Break this vial over his head and use a rag to smear it as thoroughly as possible over his body. If the contents touch you, whatever it touches will have to be cut off or every devil hunter in Japan will be after you." She handed Michiru a small glass vial with a clear fluid inside.
"We understand," the two Senshi said almost simultaneously.
Setsuna didn't bother to transform to her Senshi state, simply summoning the time key and opening a portal to seventeen years in the past. The Outer Senshi leapt through the portal holding tightly to one another's hand.
The portal had just closed when Setsuna realized what a horrible mistake she had just made. She was the reason that Ranma was so well liked by demons! Without her interference, Ranma Saotome would have died during the cat-fist training. Setsuna fainted, all the while screaming at the injustice of it all.
And so the cycle continues.
(I think it's sorta funny to have Setsuna be the cause of her months of torment, don't you?)
To be continued.
Author's Notes: Short chapter, I know, but a good stopping point. C&C welcome at email@example.com
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