A Ranma ½ - Sailor Moon crossover story
by Dark Phoenix
Disclaimer: Ranma ½ and its characters and settings belong to Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Kitty, and Viz Video. Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon belongs to Takeuchi Naoko, Koudansha, TV Asahi, and Toei Douga, and DIC.
For reasons best left unsaid, the girls decided that they wanted to stay on Pokémon World for a while. Ah, never mind. They wanted to make their pokémon stronger, and Ami was determined to discover how such creatures could be so alike in reproductive and evolutionary manner, but so totally different in physical appearance and varying intelligence. What did this translate into? A very long stay in a little city named Hickory, that's what.
Minako and Makoto, in order to fuel their desire to learn as much about the creatures as possible, took jobs at the local pokémon center. They don't even have a freakin' hospital for people, yet every damned town has a pokémon center to heal pokémon who've been injured in battles. Usagi has gone off on a pokémon journey— yes, a pokémon journey— with her electric lamb, to become champion of the Pokémon League. Rei and her rat— that fleabag evolved into the most hideous wolf/rat/beaver thing I've ever seen.
And me, what do I do all day? I kick the ass of every pokémon I can. I'm getting famous for it, actually. The Pokémon League (the entire economy of this planet is based around pokémon) has even started building a pokémon gym in Hickory for other humans to come to fight against pokémon. And my egg? Three weeks, and not so much as a crack. I would have thrown it out as a dud weeks ago if Nurse Joy (they even clone the same nurse to serve at every pokémon center) hadn't checked it out and okayed it.
I walked into the bedroom that Ami and I shared in the town's boarding house. She was just wrapping up a conversation with Usagi on their wrist radios. She saw me come in and said, "Usagi is in the running for Pokémon League Champion. She's sending us tickets."
"Isn't that a little fast? She's only been gone two weeks." Damn it, if Makoto had never seen that stupid puppy, we would be home now. I should look at the bigger picture, like how we're safe from demon attacks and crazed temporal mages here, but all these pokémon are annoying.
"I don't think she sleeps very much. That and a little magic, probably, is how she managed to build up her pokémon's power so quickly. The preliminaries aren't for another month, and I have an invitation from Professor Oak to visit his laboratory. Do you want to go with me? We can take our time and you can make a few appearances at the other gyms along the way."
Weeks alone with Ami? Sure, no problem. "Yeah. When do we leave?" Maybe I would get to see what was in that egg.
"Tomorrow, if that's okay with you?"
"What's this?" I asked Ami as she handed me a black and silver backpack.
"Professor Oak sent them. They're called pokégear. We can keep our food and pokémon and stuff in them. I bought us some pokéballs in case we see something interesting along the way." Ingenious devices, pokéballs. They have a huge storage capacity, and a pokémon kept inside of one needed no food. I plan on taking some back to Earth to sell to the military. Imagine, every soldier carrying a tank in his pocket; and the prison system could definitely benefit.
We weren't bothered by many wild pokémon while walking through the tall grass that the Pokémon League kept growing everywhere. I have a feeling that they were scared of me. I let Ami and her Butterfree named Sparkles handle those brave enough to attack us. She really got a kick out of the experience, and I could literally feel, if barely, an increase in the pokémon's power after every battle.
The first night, we camped out at the base of a small mountain in the middle of the forest. Ami had caught a little ball of rock with arms that she insisted I accept, since my egg was such a late bloomer.
"It's small now," she assured me, "but they get big and strong. Here," she said, flipping through her pokédex until she found the desired picture. "See, Geodude evolves into Graveller and Graveller evolves into Golem."
It did look a little more impressive, if still not able to strike fear in the hearts of men. I read through the listed attacks of the creature, and decided I might as well go with the flow. Ami healed it from the beating Sparkles had given it, and I stored it in a pokéball.
Ami made Sparkles go for an evening flight to stretch its wings, while we made like wild pokémon.
"I admit that me and Slammer (I let Ami name my Geodude) get along well, but there is no way I'm going to take that gimp fish." How such a lame pokémon could survive when surrounded by so many that were so much more powerful than it, I'll never know.
Ami sighed. Slammer had caught this one. She just seemed determined that I should keep it. She pulled out the pokédex and scanned through it for a couple minutes. "This is what that gimp fish will evolve into after two more level gains."
The snake like dragon pokémon couldn't be the product of a Magicarp. I flipped to the Gyarados' pre-evolutionary form. It was a Magicarp. How could it gain so much mass in the short time that pokémon evolution takes?
"See the techniques," Ami pointed out. "It learns some of the strongest, and it can be taught almost any technique from other pokémon." For some reason Ami was determined that I had my own squad of powerful attack-pokémon. I couldn't use them in a fight, not a serious one, and I wasn't obsessed with them like Minako and Makoto.
"Okay, you convinced me." I'm seeing a disturbing pattern arising.
"Good. It's getting late. Do you want to camp out again, or head on into town?" I don't know if getting laid did it, or if she was just growing up, but Ami's confidence was steadily building, both in dealing with me and the world in general.
"Camping's fine. We can stop by the gym in the morning, and I can show how much better humans are than pokémon." That was my mission. Pokémon held too much value and humans too little on this world.
Back on Earth, Genma was introducing his 'son' to the Tendo family. Ryoga was taking the best way out of the situation that he could see. He was unconscious.
"He's just tired," Genma said. Underneath the table he was repeatedly pinching the imposter. He just wouldn't wake up.
"Oh, how you must have struggled to reach us at last," wailed Soun. His old friend and the future heir of the combined Saotome-Tendo schools of martial arts had been late. He had endured constant anger and mistreatment from his daughters because of his attempts to marry one of them off.
While the two old men exchanged small talk, Nabiki caught her sisters' attention and led them into the kitchen. "That boy with Dad's friend is not Ranma Saotome," she whispered to them.
"How do you know, Nabiki?" Akane was the most offended by her father's stupid decision. For weeks she had been stewing on the problem and had decided to either disown her family or murder Ranma, if she was chosen to marry him.
"I didn't want to any of us to be engaged to a psychopath, so I had him checked out by a friend of mine at the Nerima Police Department. Ranma Saotome, son of Genma and Nodoka Saotome, looks nothing like that weenie out there. The man we're supposed to be engaged to is some kind of government special agent with the Bureau of Intelligence."
"Then you mean that father's friend is trying to trick him?" Kasumi wondered aloud.
"That could be." Nabiki nodded. "Or Dad could be going along with this whole scheme. If Ranma is important enough to be a government agent, he wouldn't have any problem convincing his father not to do something stupid like force him to marry a girl against his will."
"Those sneaky, baka bastards!" Akane shouted. There was no stopping the girl now. She charged into the parlor and grabbed Ryoga by the scruff of his neck and started shaking him roughly. Slowly, the boy regained consciousness. "I know you're not Ranma!"
Ryoga's eyes filled with panic and began darting from side to side nervously. "I don't know what your talk—" Genma didn't finish the statement. Akane tossed Ryoga into him, headfirst.
"Akane's right, Dad, the real Ranma Saotome doesn't even look like this guy. See." She held up a picture taken from Ranma's dossier. "That's the real Ranma."
"Saotome," Soun wailed, "are they telling the truth?!"
Genma had been edging towards the door, but a slight miscalculation had brought him up against the wall instead. He looked for any kind of help, but Ryoga had passed out again and no one was looking very sympathetic or pacifistic at the moment.
'And a newcomer to the world of pokémon competition, Usagi Tsukino!' the announcer shouted after introducing the girl's opponent.
Usagi waved to the screaming crowd, soaking up the attention. Her opponent across from the battle ring stood on his platform looking impatient and annoyed. He hadn't gotten so much as a clap from the million people watching from within the enormous stadium.
'This battle will consist of three pokémon per trainer! Trainers ready?' Usagi and her opponent nodded. 'Then let the battle begin!!!'
The entire stadium went dead quiet. In the silence that followed, Usagi shouted, "I choose you, Dandelion!" From the pokéball held in her hand, a massive Venusaur materialized.
Pedro, almost simultaneously announced, "George, I choose you!" A roaring Onix appeared.
In the front row, directly behind Usagi, Ami whispered, "Usagi's Dandelion has a major type advantage over Pedro's George. This match should be a snap."
I nodded agreement. Reluctantly, I had picked up a considerable amount of info on pokémon from Ami, her pokédex, and our temporary companion, Professor Oak. I looked down towards the battle that was about to begin. I felt sorry for Dandelion. What kind of stupid name was Dandelion for a giant plant monster?
"Dandelion, use your razor leaf attack!" commanded Usagi. From Dandelion's leafy back, sprayed hundreds of stiff, razor sharp leafs. George— that's another crappy name for such a huge pokémon— was too slow to avoid the attack and had pebble sized chunks taken out of almost every area of his rock body.
George wasn't totally defeated. Pedro ordered, "George, dig under Dandelion!" The giant rock snake dove into the air, only to come down like a bullet, burrowing his way underground. Dandelion began to look for a place to avoid the incoming attack, but as the ground started to shake beneath Usagi's pokémon, it lost its footing and was hit full force by George's explosive resurfacing.
Dandelion didn't look nearly as hurt as George, though, and when next commanded to attack, its razor leafs sent the Onix into a dead faint.
The battles were pretty interesting, especially between the strong pokémon that just stood back and shot energy attacks at one another. Usagi won all of her battles for the day, working her way into the semifinals.
"Aren't my pokémon just the best?" Usagi cheered. Her pokémon really were some of the better ones on the field, at least as far as I had seen.
Along with Professor Oak and some family friends of his, including a boy who was competing against Usagi, we all headed to the Indigo Diner. Usagi wanted to go there because the food was served by pokémon. I just wanted something to eat. I think Ami was of my thinking on this one. The service and food was better than I had hoped.
The boy with the Professor, Ash I think, had his Pikachu out and was feeding it from the table.
"How's Pikachu doing, Ash?" asked Professor Oak.
"He's really excited about tomorrow. We're going to win for sure!"
Usagi butted in, "Not if I have anything to say about it!"
I convinced Ami to sneak away with me before Usagi started up the fireworks. We discreetly said our farewells to the Professor and Ash's mother before heading to the pokémon center/motel we were rooming in.
We were discussing something about the benefits of missionary versus doggie style when the watch uplink to my pokégear started beeping. I checked the indicator light. About time that stupid egg decided to hatch!
"Let's fly, Ranma!" Ami said. "No one will see us, as dark as it is."
I was more excited than I should have been, myself. Flying cut the trip down to less than a minute. I opened the door just in time to see the first large cracks appearing in the egg. I sat down next to it to watch, Ami holding my hand excitedly. For several minutes the egg didn't do much more than rock around and crack. It should have been a pile of dust with the number of fractures it was sporting, but it somehow maintained its shape.
When it did open, the shell fell away into dust like I had been expecting. The pokémon 'expanded' once out of its egg, because it was three times the size of the egg itself. "What is it?" I asked Ami as I picked up little bat-winged monstrosity. It was about as high as my knees and covered in short, course black fur. From both of it hands and feet extended inch long claws that had the iridescent property of mother of pearl. It looked like a little baby demon.
Ami's pokédex came up with a big fat blank space. Looks like I have myself a new kind of pokémon. "What are you going to name it?" Gender was another unknown.
I looked down at the little demon-like creature that was already asleep in my arms. "Demon, I think. It has the look." I turned it so Ami could get a better look at it, carefully so as not to wake it. I hope this thing grows up fast. I don't like children much more than I like getting struck by lightning.
"Professor Oak's computers can probably determine what type it'll be, and what would be best to feed it," Ami told me as I laid Demon on a sofa cushion. There's a thought. What if demons are the pokémon of my world?
Demon didn't stay in the cute phase for long. By the end of the next day he was as tall as my male form and had a fifteen-foot wingspan. Those little claws were six-inch long knives now. The Professor's computer did indeed determine Demon's type. He was a Dark/Fire type pokémon and it calculated that pokémon high in fiber would be the best meal it could eat for the next few weeks. I didn't want to have the local population of domestic pokémon wiped out, so Ami and I took it out to a nearby forest with some of those tree pokémon and turned it loose.
Truthfully, when it came back, Demon had grown over a foot. Heh, this joker was gonna be big.
Today was the last day of the League Championship. I zapped Demon into a pokéball and went to see Usagi compete. Ash and his mom had left earlier in the morning. He hadn't taken his loss to Usagi all that well.
'We're down to the final four trainers, ladies and gentlemen.' Like I needed the announcer to tell me that when the giant TV screen had the trainers' names and pictures on it. I ignored the next few minutes of cheering and drivel from the announcer. Ami tugged on my arm to get my attention and pointed to the arena.
Usagi was wearing a long, flowing dress of the same silver substance created by her white magic back on Ranma World when she had claimed Usagi City. Her opponent was a grizzled old man who leaned heavily on a gnarled wooden cane.
'Trainers, choose your strongest pokémon, for this will be a one-match battle!'
Usagi and the old guy messed around with their belts, choosing the one pokémon they wished to use.
'Let the battle begin!!!'
"I choose you, Dragonite!" shouted old guy. Dragonites look kinda like Puff the magic dragon to me, so it's hard to take them seriously, but they're supposed to pack some real power.
"Go, Zapdos!" The bird that flew from Usagi's pokéball looked like it was composed of chain lightning.
Ami was shocked. "Usagi actually caught one of the legendary birds." She shook her head in surprise. These legendary birds must have been famous or something, even though I'd never heard of them, because the crowd went wild after a few moments of silence.
Usagi's electric bird didn't give the Dragonite much of a chance. As soon as the battle began, it unleashed a massive bolt of lightning at its opponent. It was an attack I would have been proud of. Poor Dragonite was still twitching as the team of fat little pokémon with egg pouches carried it away on a stretcher.
"I'd better go feed Demon," I told Ami. "I should have plenty of time during intermission." I know that when in a pokéball, a pokémon doesn't get hungry, but Demon was still young and I didn't want to stunt its growth.
Twelve feet tall, thirty-foot wingspan, and foot-long claws. Demon is going to live up to his name. I got back to my seat just in time to see an Onix get blasted by a geyser of water. Even I know not to put a rock pokémon up against a water one. It was down to Usagi and a boy named Jiro.
Once again I tuned out the announcer until the fight actually began.
Usagi sent out Dandelion, and Jiro used a Charizard named Torch. Ouch; bad news for meatball-head.
"Torch, let it have a taste of your fire-blast attack!" Jiro commanded. From Torch's mouth exploded the kanji symbol for fire, in the form of a solid flame. Dandelion used its tentacle things to pull itself mostly out of the blast's path, but one side was badly singed, and the pokémon was crying out in pain.
Usagi cried out to her pokémon, "Dandelion, hang in there! I'll save you!" I could feel the workings of a major white casting. Usagi raised her arms into the air. Arcs of golden energy leapt from hand to hand as Usagi chanted. A deep groaning hum filled the air as Usagi pointed her hands, palms flattened, at Dandelion. A beam of gold and silver light shot from her hands and collided with Dandelion. The pokémon's wounds faded away in an instant, and it was on its feet roaring.
"Use your solar beam!" Usagi called to it.
The giant flower on Dandelion's back opened up and pointed towards Torch, who at Jiro's prompting had taken to the air in order to avoid the beam. The initial strike did miss, but Dandelion continued to power the beam and scythed it through the air. Torch couldn't maneuver fast enough and was hit in the back by the laser.
When the Charizard struck the ground it didn't move, the only sign that it still lived was the slow rise and fall of its barrel-like chest.
"Incredible folks, absolutely incredible! Never before have we seen such Trainer to Pokémon interaction, but the question is, will the judges disqualify Trainer Tsukino for use of an unclaimed… pokémon healing ability?”
'Yes, the judges have ruled in favor of Trainer Tsukino! She is this year's Pokémon League Champion!!!'
I still hadn't trained Demon not to eat other people's pokémon, so he couldn't come to the party thrown in celebration of Usagi's victory.
The Senshi of the day was glowing with pride and surrounded by her pokémon, whom she continuously petted or praised. Minako and Makoto managed to get off of work to be at the celebration, and were having their ears talked off by Usagi whenever she wasn't administering to her menagerie.
Nature called and I was about to answer, when I passed close enough to Usagi and her friends to hear some of their conversation.
"Can you believe it? I wonder who the father is." That was Makoto.
"I thought that her and Ranma were together, you know, like Haruka and Michiru," commented Usagi.
"Well, obviously she isn't just a lesbian," Rei, with her super-rat, snapped. Something was wrong. Very, very wrong. "She couldn't be if she's pregnant.
Pregnant. Ami. Pregnant. OH, SHIT!!!
I don't remember much after that, because thankfully I fainted.
To be continued.
Author's Notes: It seemed like it would be fun to see Ami and this version of Ranma deal with parenthood. They all leave PokéWorld next chapter, too. C&C welcome at firstname.lastname@example.org
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